Ever have an argument with your partner that you know you could have easily avoided if you had just stopped talking and thought first. We all have and it usually ends up with one of the people in the relationship saying something hurtful to the other, having quiet time away from each other and then making up. I like to call this the Argument Cycle or more simply a normal relationship!
Actually, I’m currently writing this blog in this exact situation as venting my frustrations in my blog is much better than scratching my boyfriends eyes out. So my creative juices are flowing and I’m going to share my ‘Highly effective’ ways of avoiding the argument or just plain getting away from it blowing up even further.
1. Master the phrase ‘I am wrong darling’
Granted this is a tough one, that admittedly I am terrible at, but it’s probably the easiest way to avoid an argument.
Simply by admitting you are in the wrong. Even if you are not in the wrong and they are definitely in the wrong, sometimes it’s just easier and better for you both if you say you’re in the wrong. Two wrongs don’t make a right as they say!
See, by no one admitting they are in the wrong, it simply creates a stalemate and ends up in either (a) you both not talking for a day until eventually one of you gives (usually me in my relationship) or (b) you both start talking and eventually the argument starts up again over the same problem of who was in the right.
Take my advice, if you want an easy life just admit you are wrong, because more than likely you probably are.
2. Pull a sickie
This is definitely one of my favourites, and it takes every ounce of my GCSE Drama that I picked up at High School.
So, if you can imagine, you are in the midst of an argument, you foaming at the mouth like some raging beast, your partner getting rather too close to the kitchen knives for comfort, and then you suddenly feel faint and sick, you put your hand out onto the kitchen counter looking to steady yourself in case of a sudden black out. Your partner rushes to check you are safe and steady and helps you sit down and get you something to help.
Argument over, and them drama skills didn’t go to waste after all!
3. Learn to speak like a Royal
Ever noticed how when a member of the Royal Family speaks, they do so in a calm and often soft tone, as if they have no emotions.
At the start of the conversation with your partner, if it’s to complain, learn to lower your tone and ask in a nicer way, it’s much better and will often avoid aggravating or annoying your loved one.
4. Play Monopoly and have a ‘Get out of Jail free’ card.
You have to accept it, sometimes it is actually your fault, you aren’t always right and no matter how hard you try it’s sometimes easier to just admit that you wrong. So it’s always helpful to have an escape plan.
Use your partner’s weakness to your advantage and turn on the charm, admit that you are wrong and ask them what you can do to make it up to them. It’s much easier and will avoid that whole ‘talk to the hand cause the face don’t want to hear it’ period.
5. Pretend you’re Jason Bourne
This is a simple one…if you can’t win the argument just say you forgot what the argument was about and move on to making it up to them…in my case plying him with chocolate!!
6. Plain underhanded insults (use with caution)
Now, this probably isn’t the best method but if your partner is really getting on your nerves then a nicely timed comical insult can end the argument pretty quickly. Something along the lines of:
Aww, it’s so cute when you try to talk about things you don’t understand
If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world
Please do not blame me if your relationship ends – note the warning
7. Hugs are the answer to all life’s problems
If the world simply gave more hugs then would Brexit have happened? If Donald Trump had received more cuddles as a child would he still be becoming the next President?
These are all very big questions, but I do know that an argument can easily be stopped by giving my boyfriend a big hug and it usually calms me down too.